The time has come around again for my annual horror binge. My favorites include Halloween Wars (if you love cooking shows like Chopped or Cupcake Wars, this is perfect for you), Children of the Corn (it’s almost comical now that I’ve watched it for the hundredth time) and of course, The Addams Family. If I have not watched The Addams Family, Halloween cannot be over. Morticia Addams is my feminist icon and the Addams family is my role model for a healthy home life. WARNING SPOILERS AHEAD. If you have not yet watched The Addams Family – stop reading now and go watch it. It is worth your time.
Morticia Addams is my matriarchal inspiration.
She is weird and macabre. But gorgeous, thoughtful, loving, and tough as nails. She preaches self-confidence and is devoted to her family.
When she is faced with her husband, Gomez’s, ex-lovers, the very ones he had a falling out with his brother over, she is nothing but polite. Flora and Fauna, conjoined twins, make a playful jab at her about how she stole Gomez from them. Her response was the epitome of grace and elegance. “Flora, Fauna, how can I compete? You’re twice the woman I am.”
Morticia is an ally for women.
She is above petty insults and wins the conversation in the best way possible – by killing them with kindness. Her compliment (and literal observation) prove that she is confident in herself and relationship with her husband and she doesn’t need to bring down his exes to make herself feel better.
In a conversation with her daughter, Wednesday’s, teacher, she was shown a picture Wednesday brought in of her great-aunt. Morticia explained “Wednesday’s great-aunt Calpurnia. She was burned as a witch in 1706. They said she danced naked in the town square and enslaved the minister.” When the teacher showed her surprise, Morticia responds, “But don’t worry. We’ve told Wednesday: college first.”
Morticia has her priorities down.
She knows her daughter needs to have an education before pursuing her passions. And yes, it’s unorthodox, but she doesn’t care. She will support Wednesday no matter what she wants to do as long as she finishes her education first. That is true empowerment right there.
She is a loving wife, a doting mother, and an amazing individual. Her family is everything to her but she allows herself to remain her own person. And this family is the epitome of a happy, healthy home. We should strive to be like them.
Morticia and Gomez are what I want my future marriage to look like.
They are so deeply in love even after three children and are completely devoted to one another. One of the amazing things about a new relationship is the spark that ignites and the fear is that eventually, that spark will dim out. With Morticia and Gomez, that spark turned into a flame.
Morticia and Gomez are also incredibly supportive of one another and are there for the other in their darkest times. When Morticia said, “I’m just like any modern woman trying to have it all. Loving husband, a family. It’s just… I wish I had more time to seek out the dark forces and join their hellish crusade,” Gomez’s immediate response was “You can! You shall! And so it must be!” Gomez wants his wife to have everything in the world and is supportive when she mentions she wants to return to her passions. After this, they start hiring nannies so Morticia can start doing the things she used to love. That is true love.
When Gomez was at his lowest – his brother, Fester’s, treacherous and manipulative wife, Debbie, had taken his family fortunate – Morticia stood by him. He had fallen into a depression and she did not once waver from his side. She did everything she could to get him out of his funk and when that didn’t work, she confronted the problem head-on. She took charge when Gomez was at his bleakest and he loved her for it. That is what a healthy relationship is. It’s easy to abandon someone when the going gets tough. Gomez is crazy wealthy and Morticia was accustomed to a certain lifestyle, but she was willing to give up all the splendor in the world and even get a regular job if it meant keeping her family together.
They were the best parents any child could ask for.
They played together as a family, asked their children about their day, and comforted them together. Gomez was just as much a part of raising the children as Morticia was – breaking gender roles prevalent in 90% of tv shows and movies. They went to parent/teacher conferences, helped their kids with homework, and sat proudly in their school plays.
When Debbie tricked Morticia and Gomez and made them believe that their children wanted to go to a happy, colorful summer camp, they were supportive even though they didn’t approve of it. All they wanted was for their children to be happy, and if it meant doing something new to them, they would do it with a smile. They met with the other “normal” parents and tried their best to fit in, they supported their children in the camp and even went to their play.
Their third child was born an exact copy of Gomez – complete with a tiny mustache. But when Debbie got close to the baby, he turned into a “normal” blonde hair, blue eyed, happy boy. The Addams’s worst nightmare. But still, Morticia read him Dr. Seuss like a normal mother and made him as happy as she could. Her own opinions didn’t matter – only her baby’s happiness and safety.
That is true parenting and love. Accepting and loving your children regardless of what you had originally believed. Morticia and Gomez did everything in their power to put their children first, even if it meant swallowing their pride.
And we can’t forget about their credo: “Sic gorgiamus allos subjectatos nunc. ‘We gladly feast on those who would subdue us’.”
That’s a badass family motto if I’ve heard one.
They have a “we are Addams” attitude that got them through their darkest hour and will continue to keep them together. They are united as a family and nothing will ever break them up. I will continue to look at them as a role model for parenting and relationships. Morticia Addams will forever be my feminist Queen.1