Comparison Is The Thief Of Joy


I recently re-posted a quote that really hit home with a lot of people and it made me realize one thing. I am not alone. I am not the only one who feels like I’m delayed on certain life events.

To paint the picture more clearly, here is the quote:

“Getting your first degree after 21 is still an achievement. Being married after 30 is still beautiful. Starting a family after 35 is still possible. Buying a house after 40 is still a boss move. Don’t let people rush you with their timelines!”

Whether it’s through social media or your own family asking you when you’re going to have a baby, the thought pops into your brain without you even realizing it. Am I behind on life? Is this even normal? Like the quote says…don’t let people rush your timeline. Everything that’s meant for you will happen in due time, it is up to us to trust the journey and have faith that God or the universe (whatever you believe in) has us covered!

Essentially my goal here is to provide you with some suggestions and guidance of how we can let go of comparing ourselves to others so that we remain true to ourselves and our journey.

“The only person you should try to be better than is the person you were yesterday”

How do you view yourself?

Its critical to pay attention to how we view ourselves and really spend time alone if we have to in order to work on our own self worth and self image. This focus takes away from others and allows us to really take a look at ourselves in a deeper perspective.

Focus on you. The best thing you can do is write down your values. What values are important to you? This is what makes YOU special and sets you apart from others. Once, you have clearly identified what your core values are it will allow you to approach things in a more optimistic way.

Don’t forget, you are in control. If you are unhappy or unsatisfied with the person you’ve become or realize that you’re not able to identify your values, it’s okay. You are still in control and able to change that.


Why should you limit your time on social media?

Studies have shown that social media draws the attention onto others rather than focusing on yourself. One of the main internal challenges people face with social media is feeling overwhelmed by others success and accomplishments. This can have anyone feeling discouraged or inadequate but that’s why the first part of this section is important. If you have a healthy self image of yourself and have a clear vision of where you see yourself in life than others accomplishments shouldn’t affect you, on the contrary, it should inspire you. Regardless, limiting your time on social media will lead you to spending more time focusing on yourself and what you can achieve.

You have probably already figured this out by now but the truth is that social media presents us with a distorted version of reality. Meaning that what you see is probably not real, maybe it is, who knows. Either way, getting caught up with you may come across really isn’t worth getting worked up over.

Lastly, social media can cause your happiness to become too dependent on others because it can trap you in the mindset of seeking validation from other people. Your happiness should primarily depend upon whether or not you enjoy something and not what others think or how many likes/shares/comments a post may get.

Why should you have a gratitude journal?

When I started my first gratitude journal, I’ll be honest, I wasn’t sure of what to write or what I should write. It started off very short. As I stayed committed to the daily routine of jotting down what I am grateful for everyday, my perspective on everything started to change. And I started to really look forward to waking up, starting my day, and looking out for those little things throughout the day that I appreciate and am grateful for.

Your body can feel it.

I believe this to be true. Even though at the beginning it may seem like okay ‘why am I doing this??’ I promise you the more open you are to really taking in this exercise, the more you will really start to benefit from the power of gratitude and the magnificent abundance it can bring into your life. As you stay committed and persistent to the task of keeping a gratitude journal and writing down what you’re grateful for, your body will start believing what it is that you are thinking and writing down.

It can help you let go of limiting beliefs and help build strength for when things don’t go so well.

We tend to see what it is that we expect in our lives and as a result of this, what it is that expect is limited by the beliefs we have about ourselves and about what is possible and likely to happen. If for instance, we are practicing gratitude and incorporating in our daily lives, our beliefs can change. We have the power to change them! By affirming what it is that we are grateful.

If things aren’t so great, keeping a gratitude journal will really help get you through the tough times. And as you begin to practice gratitude, things will begin to turn around. The power of gratitude can help strengthen you through life’s challenges and really help get you through them by focusing on the positive things and the things that you are grateful, sending forth positive vibrations and good energy.

Chapter preview from #PerfectlyImperfect 🙂






Also published on Medium.