Self Discovery

Embrace Your Flaws, Finding Belonging

You're perfectly imperfect

Every day we are reminded of the flaws we have. Some we may be very aware of, others not at all. Society has made us believe that our flaws are something bad, but really they’re not. What if we changed our perspective on how we see our flaws and used it to make us better…to guide us toward self-improvement? Here are a few things you must do in order to embrace your flaws to work for you instead of against you.

Ask yourself: Are you willing to change the things you can change to improve yourself?

If you’re willing to look past the imperfections and decide to work on improving yourself, you can simply start by taking small baby steps. Something like picking up a book to challenge your mind or maybe just simply being nicer to people.

Remove the self-limiting beliefs you have about yourself.

You can’t choose to move forward if you’re still stuck in self-pity. Develop optimism and think positive. The possibilities of what can happen when you start making a step towards becoming a better version of yourself will start to appear.

Keep in mind that change doesn’t happen overnight. It is a process, a process that you should enjoy. Get around people who are also on this journey and can help keep you accountable. You can learn a lot from putting yourself in the right environment. You can meet people who can introduce you to different resources, places, and books that can help you on your journey of becoming a better version of yourself.

How to accept and love the things you can’t change…

Many of us, including myself, have found ourselves at least once in our lives, suffering between who it is that we are and who it is that we portray to the world in order to gain acceptance, or the concept of belonging. Belonging is different than fitting in.

Don’t allow what anyone else may say or think about you influence the way you see yourself. I highly recommend reading the Four Agreements, A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom by Don Miguel Ruiz; it will completely change the way you feel about your self-limiting beliefs.

Find a healthy outlet that will allow you to escape.

For me, it’s working out or dancing. Many times while even doing the things that we enjoy we can catch ourselves in perfection mode, worrying about how you look or how people will look at you. Take this healthy outlet for what it is, an experience for you to enjoy. Just enjoy the present moment in it.

Most importantly, find your happy place. This can be a room or simply a state of mind. For me, it is sitting outside in my balcony with a good book. It should be a place that brings you peace.

Embrace your flaws before you improve them

The first step of the transformation process is to be honest with yourself. You’d be surprised how many of us could relate to one another when it comes to how we see our flaws. The best thing we could do for ourselves and each other is to look within, be honest, and acknowledge the challenge, whatever it may be.

When we move ourselves out of feeling like a victim because of our flaws and start learning about ourselves and how to deal with them we can start to feel grateful. The truth is you can’t feel gratitude and self-pity at the same time. Choose to love yourself.

Listen to this special podcast episode that talks more about embracing your flaws and #PerfectlyImperfect.


Also published on Medium.

Jackie is the author of